Demisexuality: Symptoms, Causes, Treatment

What are the symptoms of demisexuality?

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction or interest in someone unless a strong emotional or romantic connection is formed first. It’s important to note that demisexuality is a spectrum, and experiences can vary among individuals.

Some common experiences and feelings associated with demisexuality include:

1. Limited sexual attraction: Demisexual individuals may feel little to no sexual attraction to others until a deep emotional bond is formed.
2. Emotional connection: They often prioritize emotional intimacy and connection over physical attraction.
3. Slow to develop sexual attraction: Even when a strong emotional bond is present, sexual attraction may develop slowly or not at all.
4. Difficulty with casual sex: Demisexual individuals may find it challenging or unfulfilling to engage in sexual activities without an emotional connection.
5. Identification with asexual spectrum: Some demisexual individuals may also identify as part of the asexual spectrum due to their limited or specific experience of sexual attraction.

It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are unique, and not all demisexual individuals will experience these symptoms in the same way.

What are the causes of demisexuality?

The causes of demisexuality are not fully understood and likely involve a combination of biological, psychological, and social factors. Some possible factors that may contribute to demisexuality include:

1. Biological factors: Differences in brain chemistry or hormonal levels could play a role in how individuals experience sexual attraction. However, there is limited research specifically on the biological aspects of demisexuality.
2. Psychological factors: Past experiences, such as trauma or upbringing, can influence an individual’s emotional and sexual development, potentially affecting how they form connections and experience attraction.
3. Social factors: Cultural norms and societal expectations around sexuality can influence how individuals perceive and express their sexual desires. Demisexuality may be influenced by societal messages that emphasize the importance of emotional connection in relationships.
4. Personal experiences: Individual experiences and relationships can shape how someone experiences and understands their sexual orientation. A person’s unique combination of life experiences may contribute to their identification as demisexual.

It’s important to note that sexual orientation is complex and multifaceted, and there is no single cause for demisexuality or any other sexual orientation. Each person’s experience of demisexuality is unique, and research into the causes and mechanisms of demisexuality is still ongoing.

What is the treatment for demisexuality?

Demisexuality is not a disorder or a condition that requires treatment. It is a sexual orientation, similar to being heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. As such, there is no need for treatment to change or alter one’s demisexual orientation.

For individuals who are struggling with understanding or accepting their demisexuality, therapy can be helpful. A therapist can provide support, validation, and help navigate any challenges related to their sexual orientation. Therapy can also help individuals explore their feelings, develop coping strategies, and build self-confidence.

It’s important for demisexual individuals to feel accepted and supported in their identities, just like individuals of any other sexual orientation. Societal acceptance and understanding of diverse sexual orientations, including demisexuality, can play a significant role in the well-being of individuals who identify as demisexual.

For those who are not demisexual, I recommend Tanner Conrad’s Intimacy and Sex. It is a guidebook for men.